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Response, 1-13: Dance or Live
"I am... looking at my life, the passion I have had for this form
and doubting everything about it."
A Letter from Sarah
Photography by Jamie Phillips
About your article.... I would love to get set up with a dentist
when I am next over and as for the rest I am telling the truth....
I am so so so lucky,
truly one of the lucky ones.... There is no doubt about that. The
fact remains that I am 40 years old and live in no space with all
my costumes and sets and have to climb over the bed to get to the
bathroom. It has never felt not worth it until now... but for some
reason this year I am exhausted. I wish I could fix my teeth, have
someone stay over without climbing over them to pee. (Try it with
a broken foot or busted calf.) Play the accordion if you are good
at it! Could be that I am whining, self-indulgent, smug, ungrateful....
Could be I am a weakling and just not cut out for it.... Could be
that dance even when you are one of the lucky ones who gets to be
commissioned and travel the world takes a heavy toll in ways that
are subtle and that my tiny apartment is one way I feel that I have
made a choice in my life that is not supporting me.... You could
have me stay over in Paris it sounds like.
I am really, I suppose,
looking at my life, the passion I have had for this form and doubting
everything about it. You can doubt my integrity or fortitude because
of that if it serves you, but it is actually how it is for me right
Dance Insider photograph by Jamie Phillips and copyright 2005
Jamie Phillips. Used by permission of the photographer.
for the record I have not yet received European compensation that
has fully covered the tour of "Shadowmann" apart from in one venue.The work is actually
too unwieldy for the structures that exist, and so even with its
rough qualities it is expensive to tour, and as I was told by one
European presenter, "For that amount of money we can get someone
people really want to see."
Sarah Michelson's "Daylight" will be performed at P.S. 122 from
January 17 through January 22, with show-times through January 19
at 8 p.m., and January 20 - 22 at 7 & 9 p.m.
Thinking of calling it quits? Finding reasons to carry on? E-mail
your story to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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